My Longest Blog Yet (I Think)

I think if you ask 100 people what Heaven is like, you'll get 100 different answers. The Bible doesn't say much and what it does say is very open to interpretation. When I was a kid, I thought Heaven would be a very boring place where no fun is allowed and the only good thing about being there is that you weren't burning in Hell. And what I believed stayed along those lines for a very long time. But after some reading in past years, most notably Donald Miller and C.S. Lewis, a different idea of what Heaven is like has formed in my mind. Not all of it mind you, but parts. It's not something I actually like to talk about; as with most things religious or political, so much as someone hears what you have to say, there's likely someone to disagree. However, it's either write about this or write about something I've written about before. So, here's how I picture Heaven (Part 1).
You get to Heaven and you can't see anyone else around, which actually makes you a little nervous if you're really in Heaven because you're pretty sure you'd see some old friends and family there. And then Jesus shows up and He says, "Hey (insert your name here), I've been waiting so long to be able to talk to you one on one; I'm glad you're here."
You know it's Jesus just because there's no way not to know. But you're in shock to actually be in His presence alone, with no one else around, and he wants to talk to you! You knew at some point you'd get to talk to Him, but only after you'd been in Heaven for awhile. Certainly there's lots of other people Jesus would want to talk to before you; better christians, famous christians, or at least more interesting christians. But sure enough, here He was wanting a conversation with just you.
So there's some small talk and then Jesus suggests taking a walk. It's only a few short steps and then suddenly you're some place of immense beauty. Maybe the place is a real one you knew on Earth, maybe it's completely imaginary. And the place can be a river, mountain top, skyscraper, distant planet, or whatever place you always thought of as more beautiful than anywhere else (for me it'll be the Cliffs of Moher). And you're there with Jesus just enjoying the view while neither of you says anything. Then you realize that while you're seeing this incredibly view, you're also seeing something else. Somehow playing before you while not obstructing the view is something that looks like a movie. You begin to focus on it and notice it's not a movie, but a story. And not just any story, but your story. Jesus is showing you the story of your life.
It doesn't go in straight chronological order, but jumps around.
Here's a scene where you're just a child and playing around in the goofy manner like children do. Seeing it from the outside, you laugh at how silly you were. Then hundred of scenes like this from your life go by, even ones in which you were much older than just a kid. These are scenes of unabashed and innocent fun and you enjoy them as if you were living the moments all over again.
Next up is scenes of your accomplishments in life, big and small. Sports trophies, school awards, that time you ate a bug on a dare. As these play, the sense of pride you used to attach to these moments begins to fade. It's not that you don't think it was cool and kind of fun to accomplish those things, but you realize those trophies and plaques are nothing more than medal/plastic/wood and school awards are really just pieces of paper with a lot of fancy writing on them. And also, you're a little embarrassed now about eating the bug.
Then start coming scenes of your sin. At first it's just stupid little sins you committed throughout life that you'd always told yourself didn't really count as sin. But still you're a little embarrassed that here you are seeing these, with Jesus watching too! Then come the other sins, the ones you couldn't even excuse to yourself when you were alive. And now you're ashamed. You wonder if Jesus is only doing this to show you how you don't belong where you are. You look back wondering if He's just waiting to scold you. But He isn't. Instead He hugs you, says that it's ok, and smiles like a wise father.
Then comes the grand finale: All those moments in when you felt hurt begin to be shown; the most painful times in your life. When you felt you were utterly worthless and had no reason to be in the world. Moments in which you actually questioned your faith. You have to fight tears as you wonder why was He showing you this; why is your first experience in Heaven turning out to be so painful when Heaven was supposed to be a place of immense happiness?
And then the scenes stop and fade away to be replaced by a picture. There's no way to describe what this picture actually looks like and all I can really call it is The Big Picture. The Big Picture is all the scenes of your life put into their proper place and how they all had their purpose in your story, even the sins and the pain. And it shows you how your story was so integral to the stories of so many others. And it's when you see this that you can't help but feeling anything but love and joy.
No matter how insignificant you ever felt, that you were just one of billions upon billions to inhabit the earth, you were a linchpin in God's story. It didn't even matter how far from perfect you were, He chose you for a part that the story could not exist without.

It's quite possible (and probable) that this is nothing of what going in to Heaven will be like. But for me, it seems a lot better than thinking I'm going to wait in a long line and have to wait til I get to the front to see if I'm even going to be allowed in.