Summer isn't over, but it's closer to its end than its beginning

 It's that time of year where, if you're from here, you notice the decrease in daylight. The trees are mostly still green, but you know it's only a matter of days before you start seeing yellow leaves. And not long after that, the trees will be mostly yellow and even the sunny days will have a little chill to them. 

I really don't like this time of year. Which is kind of funny as I love fall. I even love pre-fall, that time I mentioned when the leaves are just starting to turn yellow. But for the couple weeks when the only noticeable difference is less sunlight, I just feel dread. There's this realization that no matter how much I may have done over the summer, the season will be over soon enough and I'll feel like I didn't do enough. 

For instance, I've done more hiking this summer than the last few summers combined. But there's still a bunch of hikes I didn't get to doing and now that the end of summer is right around the corner, I know I'm not likely to get to them all. And I know that's not really the worst thing, but it still makes me feel like I went wrong somewhere and let too many days go to waste. 

There's also the realization of another summer single. Which, in the grand scheme of things (whatever that scheme and those things may be) isn't really that horrible a thing. But a little while ago, I met someone and I was pretty damn positive there was more than just a friendly connection there. A connection reinforced by her not being my normal type (though I'm still not sure what my normal type is) and my therapist at the time telling me I needed to branch out from my normal type. Regardless, I was wrong about there being any sort of connection beyond her being friendly and me being foolish. It happens. I'm just a bit bummed to see the end of summer around the corner and I'm no closer to dating again than before summer started.

The other existential dread with this time of year is knowing that Halloween candy is about to show up on store shelves. I'm not going to lie to myself this year that I can resist it and just wait for the sales after Halloween. The challenge will be not buying too much of it. Mostly for the sake of my bank account, but also to try and keep my waistline from getting any bigger, especially once we've lost lots of daylight and I go back to my natural sedentary ways. 

Song of the Day