Back to Sobriety. (Hopefully).

 I love beer. Like a lot. And the whole "craft brew scene" - that's my jam. I even thought at one point I'd get really into home brewing (though that didn't turn out to be the case). There'd even been times I daydreamed about working in the brewing business. However, as much as I love beer, it turns out I love being drunk even more. So on any given night when I'd tell myself I'm just going to have a couple beers before bed, I most likely started with a couple beers and then pulled out the hard stuff. Which was a habit I'd developed years ago, recognized was a problem, and decided to take a year off from drinking.

Not counting the world going to shit, Sober 2020 was awesome for me. And while going sober for that year didn't give me the super powers I thought it would, it felt like I was moving in the right direction in life. And I loved that feeling. And I thought for sure because I loved that feeling so much, there was no way come 2021 that I'd go back to my alcoholic tendencies. Sadly, I was wrong. 

So it's back to sobriety. I hope. I don't imagine it'll be as easy this time as it was last time. Last time I had an end date, so I was able to keep looking forward to that. This time I have no idea. I hate the idea of saying I'm quitting for good - I like to imagine one day I'll be one of those guys sitting in local breweries talking very pretentiously about the beer I'm drinking. But I also hate to think I'm gonna keep feeling like I'm missing out on the life I want to live because it's so much easier to stay home and be drunk all the time. 

I know it's already too late for me to accomplish a lot of what I want to in life. Hell, as much as I like to dream, I'd need like five or six lives to do it all (or like six bodies all sharing one consciousness). But there's still quite a bit I think I can accomplish and I know the number one thing in my way right now is my drinking. So, God willing, it's going to be back to the sober life for me.